Good . Enough

When I was younger, I would sit and draw for ages. In fact, I probably loved drawing as much as I loved writing. Along the way though, as various people commented on or judged my artwork, I created less and less.

I grew increasingly frustrated that I couldn’t produce what was ‘in my head’ and harshly compared and judged myself (a beginner) against established artists that I admired and loved.

If only I knew then about Resistance and Fear. 

If only I knew then to be gentle with myself.

If only I allowed myself to simply explore, irrespective of the outcome.

Would I be in a different place now? Would I have a different creative life? I guess the choices I made in the past were the ones I was best equipped to make at the time. (It has taken me a long time to realise that and to stop berating myself.)

Today, after wrestling various excuses not to, such as ‘It would take too long’ and ‘I didn’t have the time,’ I decided to join my children in a drawing exercise. Obviously, that was Resistance speaking. How crazy is that?! Of course creative work takes time - isn’t that part of the process, part of the joy?

The three of us followed an instructional drawing lesson (on DVD) by Betty Edwards who wrote Drawing On The Right Side Of The Brain. (I think EVERY art teacher needs to read her book, and perhaps any parent who would like to encourage creativity in their children.)

We each chose our composition and worked at our own pace. 

I started tentatively and felt that my initial markings on the paper were ‘not right’. I had only a vague idea of what I was doing. I couldn’t see how I would complete the drawing or if it would ‘come together’ at all. But, I kept drawing. I referred back to the instructions (and asked my children for clarification) and I KEPT GOING. 

Then, just after I thought that I might have to throw my effort away and start again - something happened. I erased some shading and all of a sudden my picture ‘popped’. It was working. I was excited and I kept going.

Time passed. I finished my drawing. My critical eye noted a couple of areas where I’d like to improve but overall I was happy. I definitely felt that it was ‘good enough’. And for me now, I am learning to accept that ‘good enough’ is certainly better than not creating.

Funnily, though I have been describing today’s drawing practice, my reflections could hold just as true for my writing process.

There are many times when I have begun without a clear direction but I have just kept writing; adding a bit here, changing a bit there. Then, somehow miraculously because it didn’t seem like it really came from me, I have gratefully found that ideas, things, ‘magic,’ as Elizabeth Gilbert refers to it, have happened. 

In both these creative endeavours, the key has been to just get on with it despite my initial resistance. Creative work cannot appear unless we commit and do the work.